The Leisure Time of a Mom

June 17, 2010 at 2:40 pm (Eating Out, Family, House, Marriage, Opinion, Parenting, Shopping, Sleep, Toddler, Uncategorized)

As I was catching up on my DVR last night, I came across an episode of Dr. Phil which was very interesting.   There was a study conducted by a sociologist at the University of Maryland which claims that moms have an extra 30-40 hours of leisure time a week!! HUH?  He counts things that I would not necessarily include in “leisure time”.  Things like waiting for a tow truck, going to the dentist, etc doesn’t that sound leisurely?  Normally I would think that leisure time involves a beach, a frozen drink, a cabana boy to bring me said drink, and someone trustworthy watching my daughter so that I can actually relax!!!!

I am a stay at home mom.  Relaxing right?  No need to wake up early, get dressed, schlep my daughter to school, sit in traffic, work, then do it all backwards?  My “job” is taking care of my 2 year old.  I am on call all the time.  It does not end.  The time that I can sneak away to check emails is peppered with calls of “Mommy!!!” or little hands on the keyboard.  Maybe I can check emails or facebook from my iphone right?  Well, as soon as she sees me pull that out, she wants to play with it – so out of my hands it goes.  Getting her dressed is a battle, getting myself dressed is done with one ear constantly making sure I don’t hear any crashes or screaming from the other room where she’s playing.  Driving in a car included listening to Mickey or Laurie Berkner, don’t get me wrong, I love Laurie but I really do miss driving along singing to MY music! Then there are the books strewn around the back of my car which she wants.  I go shopping!! that’s leisure right?  Pushing a stroller through a mall at warp speed.  if I’m lucky I can avert her eyes to something else while we pass the Disney Store or Build A Bear otherwise the screaming ensues and invariably we walk out with a new Mickey “thing” or a new bear.   IF I get to shop for myself it’s while entertaining her with stickers, snacks, or my iphone.  making sure she doesn’t grab things off racks, this is all if she’s in a good mood.  If she’s not is a good mood – all bets are off.  I will normally just have to hightail it out of the mall while she is screaming and trying to imitate houdini and escape from her stroller.   I also get to eat out – yay!? No leisurely lunch for me anymore.  Hurrying to order for me and for Alexis.  Keeping her entertained with crayons or whatever until the food arrives.  First getting her food ready, making sure it’s not too hot, cutting things into toddler sized pieces.  Then I scarf down my food with half my attention on her, my mommy reflexes always on edge ready to jump and prevent any spills or splashes, or if it’s a really fun lunch – anything from being launched.  Ok she’s done eating, let’s get the check, clean her off and go.  That was so relaxing!!!!

Back home.  Play time again.  This is where I can maybe jump on the computer again with the “mommy!” cries in the background or the little hands on the keyboard.  Then it’s naptime.  Ahhhhh.  Nap time.  Time for me to relax!!!! Wait – what’s that I hear?  Oh she doesn’t want to sleep.  She’s wants up.  But she’s so tired, why won’t she just fall asleep!!??!!  Ok so an hour later of tears, bribes, rocking, singing, and sometimes driving in a car she is asleep.  Ok, now I can relax.  But I’m so terrified of waking her that I need to  make sure that any TV I watch is so low that I almost need to read lips.  And I really do need to get around to the laundry and washing the dishes, and oh yeah maybe catch up on a tv show also.  No matter what I’m doing I am always listening to the monitor and therefore my “leisure time” is always tempered with the knowledge that at best she will sleep for 3 hours, but more than likely it will be 2 hours.

She’s up.  This is usually the most difficult part of the day.  From the time she wakes up from her nap until bedtime.  She still wants to play but is usually more cranky than the pre-nap hours.  I have to figure out what’s for dinner and try to cook while keeping her away from anything that could be dangerous in the kitchen.  When Marc is in town he will come home right before dinner time so then there are 2 of us.  When he’s home he will handle her bath after dinner while I clean up the kitchen and table.  If he’s not home, then it’s all me.  Then bedtime.  This is unpredictable.  She can be a great sleeper and go right to sleep, but then there are other nights where it’s a battle of wills and could take up to an hour to fall asleep.  An hour much like nap time, she doesn’t just lie there contentedly listening to music when she doesn’t want to be there.  Most of the time she falls asleep with no problem, but every few months there is a phase, it lasts anywhere from 10 days – 2 weeks where it’s every night that she cries and does not want to sleep.  Last night, I was alone with her and by the time she fell asleep it was 9:20.  Usually I don’t eat dinner with her, I wait until she’s asleep.  So last night, I found myself having a PB&J at 9:30.  Then trying to straighten up the house.  And, hey maybe a shower.  That’s leisure right?  Yeah I’m laughing too.  The shower with the monitor on the bathroom counter.  Then and only then can I relax finally.  Again, always with the monitor and always listening.  So, I stay up late because it’s the only quiet time I get just for me.

Even sleep is not the same anymore.  I’m sure that all moms can attest to this.  Once you become a mom, you just don’t sleep as soundly because part of your subconscious is always listening to the monitor, ready to spring up at any moment.  Hopefully, she sleeps fitfully and fully through the night, but hey you never know.  She could wake up in the middle of the night and go right back to sleep or she may not.  I may bring her to bed with me because I’m too tired to fight this battle and then I have little feet kicking me and sleep is definitely compromised.  So, you see, even when I can do things “of leisure” it’s not really.  It’s always in little snippets and with a million other things floating around in my brain.

What about vacations or when I go out to dinner with a friend?  Well, not the same either.  Gone are the carefree days of really getting away.  Because, I am always thinking of Alexis and what she should be doing at the time or if she’s ok.  I will get calls and texts with updates and/or questions.  So, even those times when i do get away, my mind is not completely away.  I may not have a “job”, but I definitely work.  My job is a 24 hour a day one.  One that will be like this for as long as I can imagine.  So, please clarify your 30-40 hours of leisure time a week that I week, Mr. Sociologist, I’m not sure that you fully understand the job of a mom.

Advertisements

Permalink 1 Comment

House update with pictures!!

August 3, 2009 at 4:25 pm (Home Improvement, House) ()

Phase one is complete!! The house is painted – yay 🙂  The new vanity in the guest bathroom is installed, the blinds are installed, the accordion shutters are up, and we have begun to put up the fans and light fixtures.

Below are pictures from today – I think the colors are much better in this round of photos, plus I took front and back exterior.  We obviously still need to landscape and put up a fence.  The green on the bedroom floors is still the padding, but the actual carpet will be an off-white color.

Back

Back

Front

Front

Living Room

Living Room

Family Room

Family Room

Guest Bedroom

Guest Bedroom

Guest Bathroom

Guest Bathroom

Dining Room

Dining Room

Alexis' Bedroom

Alexis' Bedroom

Permalink 4 Comments

Progress and pictures

July 15, 2009 at 5:04 pm (Home Improvement, House, Uncategorized) (, )

I went to my house today to check on the progress being made by the professionals, and I was shocked at how much they had already done!  The painting is coming along, with a lot of the rooms painted.  There is still several days of work left, but I can now see the colors on the wall.  I took pics, you can’t see all the colors very well, b/c some of them are light, but in person they all look great!

They removed the carpet in the bedroom, so the green on the floor is padding and floor covering, not at all a finished look!

Master Bedroom

Master Bedroom

This is one of the ones that is a bit light, but it’s a pal sage green

Master Bathroom

Master Bathroom

This is the sand color

Guest Room

Guest Room

This is the color that will be the main color throughout the house

Living Room

Living Room

This is also light in the pic, but it’s a pale yellow “french vanilla” as my dad calls it

Alexis' Bedroom

Alexis' Bedroom

Another light pic – the color is a light but bright green

Play room

Play room

Permalink 1 Comment

Beginnings of a house

July 13, 2009 at 3:43 pm (Home Improvement, House, Shopping, Uncategorized) (, , , )

After 20 paint samples, we finally were able to choose the 6 colors we will use in our home.  It is impossible to post them here from the websites b/c they don’t look anything like they are supposed to.  So, I will have to just desribe them and post pics of them on my wall once they are there.  Right now, our house looks like some sort of Jackson Pollock painting with different colored squares all over.

Master bedroom: Upward (sherwin williams) – it’s a light blue gray

Master Bath: Celery (sherwin williams) – pale green, I’m going for a spa-like feel here

Guest Bedroom: Bagel (sherwin williams) – sand color, this room with be a beachy theme we’re getting a white wood daybed with trundle

Alexis Bedroom: Milkyway galaxy (Behr) – soft yellow background on which my parents will be creating a garden room mural with colorful flowers

Playroom: Honeydew (sherwin williams) – light green

Rest of the house: Bone white (Glidden) – warm neutral beige-y color

So far, we have purchased a few things.  First appliances.  The house has perfectly good appliances right now, but they’re black, and we (ok, I) really want stainless steel, so we were able to get a great deal from BrandsMart on all new GE Profile stainless appliances.  I’m going to try and sell the existing ones on Craigslist, except the fridge which we’ll move into the garage and keep as a second fridge.

Cooktop

Cooktop

Dishwasher

Dishwasher

Fridge

Microwave with vent goes over the cooktop

Microwave with vent goes over the cooktop

Double oven - top is convection

Double oven - top is convection

We also got the LG Steam washer and dryer – in red :

washer and dryer

The only piece of furniture we have actually bought so far is a sectional for the family room from Rooms to Go.

Sectional

We also bought 2 TVs – no pics of those, but they’re the Samsung LEDs, the ads for them have the hummingbird.  They’re super thin.  The one for the family room is 55″ and the one for our bedroom is 46″.

Stay tuned for more updates…

Permalink Leave a Comment

Finally! A house!

July 9, 2009 at 3:47 pm (Family, Home Improvement, House, Uncategorized) ()

After what seemed like an eternity of headaches, we are finally, officially homeowners!!! I know in my last post, I lashed out at the assholes that made this whole process more difficult than it needed to be (I won’t even get into what happened at closing).  However, there were 2 people who made things easier and definitely helped us!! First our agent friend Yaniv – I could not recommend him and his company enough!! he put in countless hours searching for the perfect home for us and driving us around.  I know that my husband is not easy to please and is very demanding and a total perfectionist.  So thanks, Yaniv for answering Marc’s countless inquiries about whether this was “a good deal”.  See his website here.  Next our attorney friend Chad, he always looked out for us and our interests.  He worked on our contracts after hours at his firm and went above and beyond for us.  We are very fortunate to have friends like these 🙂

Now, without further ado: the casa! This is all “before” we are currently working on the house and hope to move in by the second week of August.  We are painting all the interiors, replacing carpet in the bedrooms, cleaning the tile, getting new stainless steel appliances in the kitchen, updating all the lighting and adding fans, updating the faucets in the bathrooms and the kitchen, getting a new vanity in the guest bathroom, installing accordion shutters, putting up a fence, and finally buy all new furniture since we sold our house furnished!

Here are a few pics, I don’t have a picture of the guest room, the exterior front or back, the family room, or any of the bathrooms.  It has 5 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms so we definitely have room to grow in the house.  The yard is big enough for a pool and we are hoping to put one in by next summer, also we want to get a nice swing set for Alexis.

Foyer

Foyer

Living Room Left

Living Room Left

Living Room right

Living Room right

Dining Room

Dining Room

Kitchen

Kitchen

Space for dinette

Space for dinette

3 Front Bedrooms

3 Front Bedrooms

Master Bedroom

Master Bedroom

Master Bedroom Bay Window

Master Bedroom Bay Window

Permalink 2 Comments

Move, Pictures, SEO

April 16, 2009 at 6:05 pm (Baby, Family, Home Improvement, House, Marriage, Sleep)

Ok lots of topics in one post.  I guess that’s what happens when I don’t blog for almost 2 months!!!!!

First – we now have a new home, temporarily anyway.  We sold our house 6 weeks after we put it on the market and decided that it would be wise to move in with my parents until we find a house instead of rushing to find one.  We sold our house furnished so luckily we didn’t have to store all of our furniture along with our belongings.  We packed up all our stuff in the midst of working 2 weeks at the SEO (more on that later), put most of it in storage and are now happily settled into our new digs.  i gotta say I’m pretty happy here.  Not that I could live with my parents indefinitely, but it is nice to be back in my old neighborhood amongst family and friends – there’s something familiar and comforting about it.  We start the house hunt in earnest this weekend and I’m sure we will find the perfect home for us 🙂  I loved my old home but it never felt like “home” to me.  Marc was the one who chose the house long before we began dating and I moved in with him to his house and it always felt that way.  So while I really liked the house it will be nice to have a house that is truly “ours”.

Next – pictures! I am very fortunate to have a talented friend who is also a photographer, Stephanie Sokol!! I wanted to have some professional photos taken of Alexis before her first birthday and I could not be happier with the way these turned out.  Here is the link to the photos www.stephaniesokol.smugmug.com and here is the link to Stephanie’s blog http://www.stephaniesokol.blogspot.com/

Lastly, Sony Ericsson Open.  This was my 9th year working at the tournament.  I started there as the Special Events Manager as a full time employee and have since transitioned to tournament only staff and for the past 3 years I have been the Stadium Court Producer – responsible for all music, contests, ceremonies, etc that happen on stadium court.  I absolutely love what I do there and I love the people who I see from year to year.  The downside – the hours.  It’s a killer.  It’s 12 days of long hours.  I was there about 14 hours a day on average.  Marc and I met there – he’s in charge of the Ballperson program so he has the same killer hours as I do – he is actully there about 3 hours before I am in the morning so neither one of us is around too much for Alexis.  Luckily we were able to stay with my parents and they stepped in, along with other family members to act as surrogate parents while we were away!  As an added bonus this year, we were closing on our house just over a week after the end of the tournament.  So in the week that we usually recover from the exhaustion, we had to pack our house and get ready for he move.  So now we are finally getting to relax and catch our breath a bit!!!!!

Permalink 1 Comment

Adieu 2008!

December 31, 2008 at 12:04 pm (Baby, Family, Holidays, House, Parenting, Politics) (, )

I have to bid a fond goodbye to 2008.  It was a big year for me.  I went from “Leanna” to “Mommy” (actually Mama).  I have always had this quirk.  Please don’t laugh at me.  I prefer even numbered years.  No reason.  I just do.  So it is with a small amount of trepidation that I look forward to 2009.  There are a few things that I am looking forward to in 2009.  First and extremely importantly, saying Adios to Pres Bush and hello to President Obama.  I hope that the transition is smooth and that things can turn around in this country.  Second I am looking forward to hopefully being able to sell our house and move to a larger one with a yard for Alexis.  I am also looking forward to the possibility of baby #2 (and final baby).  Well, at least being pregnant not actually having baby #2 in 2009.

As for New Year’s Resolutions, I don’t do them.  I resolved several years ago to stop making resolutions.  I think they just set me up for failure.   So, I will just be positive and start fresh with all the promise and anticipation that January 1st brings.

Permalink Leave a Comment

Home Improvements

August 5, 2008 at 9:09 am (Home Improvement, House, Shopping) (, , , , )

Since Marc and I are thinking of selling our house and moving to Broward we have started doing some minor home improvemetns that we think will improve the look of the house without costing an arm and a leg.  These are also things that if we decide notto move for now, will just make the house look nicer for us!

This weekend we added hardware to our kitchen cabinets.  They never had them.  The cabinets were the kind that could be opened without a handle but there were many times that my hand slipped and I chipped a nail.   So they were needed. We installed them ourselves – I did the measuring and marking and Marc did the drilling.  I think they came out great! I am really happy with how they look.  Also in the kitchen, we bought a garbage can that  goes in the cabinets and slides out so that’s one less thing that needs to be out making it look cluttered.

We also changes the knobs in our bathroom and the guest bathroom.  I don’t have pictures of those but we replaced the plastic ones that were the same color as the cabinets with nice chrome ones that have some detail on them.  Not a huge change but a nice one.  Along the bathroom front, we very badly needed to organize the area under the sink and the catch-all drawer in our bathroom.  I went through and got rid of junk a couple weeks ago but we still needed something for organizational purposes.  We went to The Container Store (one of my favorite places) and got these really neat Rubbermaid storage bins that you screw to the bottom of the cabinet and they slide in and out and they’re stackable.  So, now I can slide it out and grab all my stuff instead of having to bend down and reach all the way to the back.  Very innovative!

Permalink 1 Comment